In An Effort To Make An Effort

Row, Row, Row Your Boat

Well, you know those rowing classes I mentioned last post? Well, we had a sort of ‘newbie’ regatta over the weekend and we totally killed it. I can’t begin to express how dumbfounded my entire team was, as we were utterly prepared to lose and lose big.

Because I have been getting a 'whaaaa' face from friends when I say rowing…. That would be the long, skinny boating kind, with the oars and the seven other people, each attached to an oar. And I have to say; I really, really like it. Like really like it! I have been meaning to row for a number of years but never got around to it because, well effectively, I was too scared. All I can say about the anxiety of trying something new….I wish I had done it sooner.

So, our team, rocking the shit out of the regatta.* As I said, we were prepared to suck, because our lessons had digressed into just two of eight of us into getting any sort of feedback from the coach, none of it good. Essentially, our boat resembled Bambi on ice, with oars going willy nilly, but at impressive speed, I must say, and the boat tipping perilously close to tipping us into the drink.

There was the promise of beer to lure us to the finishing line, and that, dear internet, is the greatest of motivators! We were all so stunned when we won the whole lot, that there was no cheering, no high fives and no acknowledgement of the winning until we had that celebratory drink in hand.

Where old meets new and vice versa

I had KB come to stay for a week a while ago. And, while it wasn’t a traumatic experience as such, it certainly wasn’t the most enjoyable time. I’m pretty confident when I say, too, that the previous statement applies to all parties.

I don’t want to write too much about the whole experience, aside from advising my future self that is NOT a good idea to have dinner with your new boyfriend, old boyfriend and his current girlfriend** under any circumstances.

My final on-line remarks about this: I am witnessing the end of a friendship, KB’s and mine and, needless to say, I am inexpressably sad about it. Even though my feelings romantically didn’t run as deep as he wanted, I did value him and what he contributed to my life. I am truly sorry that KB is no longer a part of it.

The Weather, as reported by Anna:

This weeks forecast is rain, with a chance of dry periods, though that is not to be expected. Make sure you don’t get sucked into bright mornings, and dress inappropriately, because on your way home from the office, you will encounter a rain of biblical proportions. So make sure you bring that umbrella, in fact, surgically attach it to your body (go go gadget umbrella!), and try not to drown in the enormous puddles.

Though it is tempting, don't bother doing hair or make up, or anything even vaguely reminiscent of Making An Effort, as all good works will be undone in approximately 14.6 seconds, courtesy of Zeus and his thunder stick.

That is all, Anna.

*not literally, that was the other boats….hahaha….bitches!

**of whom, I know far too much about…most notably from disparaging gossip from KB.

Twenty Tenner...Over and Out.

Happy New Year, Internet! And happy new decade, as some jackass replied with earlier this week. Uh...right.

There’s been so much happening with me lately. The holidays were so nice…two weeks of sleeping late, drinking consistently more than my liver would like and catching up with family and friends, though maybe too much of the former and not nearly enough of the latter.

One of my distressing experiences: I broke up with KB. Because I am a bitch. And apparently, I think that Christmas is an excellent time to end a relationship, particularly when the other person is spending the holidays with your family.

I did talk with him about the break up before Christmas so that if he didn’t want to come he could make different arrangements. But come he did, and I confess that it was really nice to see him: in spite of the split, I do care very much for him and enjoy his company. We had made plans to go to San Franciso for new year, but I didn’t think that it was really appropriate for me to go, considering everything, so I flew back to Vancouver and he carried on to America.

Yeah, so that’s…fun…

Onto better things:

I went to Mt. Baker in Washington the weekend before going on holiday. It was mother fucking amazing…and that’s pretty amazing!! It’s inexpensive, it’s pretty quiet, it’s got a glacier to stare at while running small children over. What’s not to lurve??

Oh…right…this: Torrential rain on the second day. Sideways rain by the bucket. Ugh.

Injuries incurred since my (not so) triumphant return to VanCity:

Thlippery Thlope:

What: Tongue incident
When: Sunday last
Where: Mt. Seymour tubing hill, second bump from the bottom
Why: Because I was giggling (read: squealing) like a school child zipping down the hill with my mouth wide open and hit the bump, which caused me to hit my chin on the tube, which caused me to bite my tongue since it was caught in between top and bottom jaw. It’s still bloody swollen and I have been talking with a slight lisp since.

I might keep the lisp.

Mystery skin gouging:

The middle finger of my right hand, which I use all of the time to flip people off due to my bad assness, has a big divot taken out of it. I don’t know when or where it happened. All I know is the stinging, stinging sensation when I was applying moisturiser after a shower. It’s too deep to be a paper cut, but too shallow to be a knife wound. And I like to thing that I’m switched on enough to realise when I’ve been cut with a knife. Or perhaps not.

Moral: Take me out back and shoot me, I am done.

My new fucking haircut:

I’ve been watching MTV’s Jersey Shore…and I love, love, love it. Love it! This show is a total trainwreck, filled with incredibly vacuous, vacant, unfortunately hairstyled guidos spending their summer at the Jersey shore in a share house. The drama that these kids make up boggles my mind and I just can’t get enough.

That’s what’s been pulling me through the dreary days between Christmas and New Year. Hey, we all need a crutch from time to time and it was either this or illicit drug use. And, well, I can't afford illicit drugs.

Anna

About My Guy

I've had a bit of a struggle in the last couple of weeks. I am missing my boyfriend more than I thought I ever would, which has taken this bewildered girl by surprise. He was just here, in our city, in my apartment and bed a couple of weeks ago and today, especially, it feels like months.

When we started hanging out (read: dating for commitment phobes), I figured, planned even, that our relationship would be of the 'with benefits' variety. I wasn't, I repeat, I WAS NOT interested in any relationship when I met KB. Shortly after we met, I spelled out in no uncertain terms that we could be casually monogamous. Meaning we could have sleepovers, but only with each other. He still teases me mercilessly about the 'casual' thing. But it turned out that he gets me and thinks that I am the most beautiful, amazing creature on the planet. And I think he's pretty fucking cool, too. (apologies for that last soppy bit, all romantical like. I'm finished now.)

It took a very long time for me to say that he was my boyfriend, though no fault of his own - except for that purple hoodie that I hate. I had a big breakup, which was my biggest and involved me shifting continents (physically, but not physically ... I'm not that strong!) Ew, sorry for that last pathetic attempt at humour, it would appear that I'm on fire today - or rather, should be!

Anyway, back to me, my favorite topic of conversation.

Because of this bad breakup, I was really reluctant (and truthfully, still am) to tie myself to another man for fear of having the guts ripped out of me again. But every time I speak to him, and especially when I see him, I get a bit more drawn in. Honestly, there is so much to be attracted to! He's talented and artistic and ambitious and smart and funny. He's got great legs and what an ass. He's quite nice to look at, too, even when his hair is too long and looks like a white man's fro. (oops, I wasn't finished at all, was I?)

This guy that I really, really like, the same guy that I am bringing home for Christmas (ack!) did something kinda crazy in August. He moved to another province for grad school. This makes me equal parts happy and sad. Happy for him because he was miserable in his previous job, had always planned on going to grad school and he's found his passion. I'm sad mostly for myself and us, because he's so far away and I can't selfishly be the little spoon everyday, instead of odd weekends and holidays where we can extricate ourselves from our lives and be together.

I'm so surprised how much I miss his physical presence. There is a big void, especially at night, where he should be: At home, watching the food network, with me, on my inflatable bed/couch, snuggling and being cutesy, making people ill with our frivolous PDA. Him making advances, me pretending to have a headache. The usual.

What prompted this entry (Don't lie, I know you're dying to know.)? I received a text earlier: Just so you know I think it's getting harder not being around you. I replied: I feel completely the same way.

-Anna

In Which My Snooze Button Gets a Workout

I have been editing this mother of a post for an hour and I can’t decide what is going on. Ack…posting crisis before midday? I have a finite amount of decision making abilities per day, as evidenced by yesterday, and I cannot figure out what I’ve used it up on this morning. Coffee order-same, number of snooze button hits-same (12, if you must know), route to work-same.

Challenge for today: Stop editing and being a general flip-flopper (or thong, if you will)* and do something productive (ha!) and constructive (ha!).

*I’m having a vision of a giant thong sitting at my desk, in the manner of bad SNL skit. I hope it’s in your head movie now, too.

Yesterday was mostly good with a pinch of bad.

The good:

I had lunch at The Greedy Pig on Cordova. It’s a stellar, slightly grimy pub that has ah-may-zing sandwiches. From me to you: order the grilled cheese and the soup of the day. That meal will never disappoint, ever. Word to the wise, though, drinks can be a bit pricey. BUT, if they have mojitos on special, eff the budget, they’re seriously worth the extra cash. So check these ladies out when you're in Van.

Last night I stayed in, which 72% of the time is one of my favoritest things to do. Hodge and I ordered pizza and coke and watched Ghostbusters on the air mattress that serves double duty as a guest bed and sofa.* Staying in was also good due to the disgusting amounts of Costco sized Toblerone that was consumed, and anything chocolate is a-ok in my world. I’d probably trade you a kidney for good chocolate.

*What, furniture for me? Pshaw, get away with your dirty mouth.

The bad:

I stayed at work late because our *big boss* is visiting and all of us are making the extra effort to look busy and indispensable. This required me to walk home in the dark which I find to be incredibly depressing and kind of tragic. Spending all your daylight hours in captivity is a major hazard of living in Canadialand, where we only get 4 hours of it a day. I’ll do it, but I’m not gonna like it. (oh hello, five year old self, I was wondering where you’d gone)

Oh the game of long distance lovers that has the power to crush your soul and spirit, or mine at least, attacked last night. I missed a call from KB. My phone was playing silly buggers and had dropped the network, and then wouldn’t make or receive any calls, mainly because it hates me and I had neglected it by leaving it in my coat pocket. By the time I got my phone working again, it was too late and KB was dreaming lovely things about me. Note to phone: Look, there’s only enough bad behaviour to go around, and I have the monopoly on it. If you continue to behave so gracelessly (which is my speciality) I will have to drown you. Both the phone and I know that this is an empty threat. We can’t live without each other, we're in love.

The Ugly:

Autumn has arrived in Vancouver and I’m a little (read: a lot) sad at the office while sitting in my wet pants. Rain water, not urine, of course. I only do that when I wear adult diapers. As always, when it’s raining and grey, I want to stay inside with cups of tea and crumpets, under my duvet with a good book. But it’s Wednesday, so I reluctantly woke up and with very little grace, swept the crusty bits out of my eyes and scowled at the world, while unclamping my teeth that I welded together mid sleep. I then dragged my grumpy ass to work.

This isn’t too ugly, this girl just likes symmetry so I tucked it in without you realising. I got you, I got you good, fucker!

-Anna